This is a special story of a grandfather and his family whom we have supported here at SIDS and Kids Victoria. Lane, aged 2, died in a tragic accident in 2004. It’s a story that is important to tell because the effects of a tragedy like this, happen to hundreds of families who lose a child suddenly and unexpectedly each year.

Darryl will tell you Lane was a real little character – his little mate – full of life, inquisitive, mischievous

Darryl Grahame has led an exciting and tough life. He’s worked in a circus, ridden wild bulls, done clowning in rodeos, been chased by crocodiles. He hosts a Saturday morning country music program and is a volunteer member of the Country Fire Authority. But nothing could have prepared this tough and life-hardened man for the death of his precious grandson, Lane. Just days after Lane’s death, Darryl wrote a moving tribute to his “little mate”. We’ve reproduced some of his memories here.

From a Poppy’s heart: Lane’s and my daily routine began about 7.30am each morning. Lane would wait until he heard Poppy’s footsteps in the kitchen, or he would grab the toaster out of the cupboard and come into the bedroom and say “toast, toast”. I had to get his toast and milk pretty quick as Lane was like a drill sergeant.

Lane had the best Mum and Dad who gave him lots of love each day. He loved helping his Poppy; it wasn’t hard to tell he was going to be a farm boy. He loved his Poppy’s tractor, ride-on mower, and helping Poppy around the farm. He loved the horses, dogs, and the cats.

On 9 February 2004, the routine was as usual. Breakfast, The Wiggles and helping Poppy fix the shed whilst Mum was doing the garden. Unknowingly this day would be the last time we held this precious boy in our arms. He gave his mother a big kiss and cuddle as if he knew something of the day’s events.

Poppy went to get a piece of timber up the paddock and Lane followed. This was the last time we would see him alive.  While Poppy was getting the timber, Lane went to see the ducks at the dam. It appears Lane slipped into the deep water. His Poppy and Mum tried hard to revive him but to no avail. The sweet Lord needed Lane to care for the roses in Heaven’s Garden.

I don’t know how in the future his Mum and I will manage around the farm without our little helper. I cannot express the love that we hold in our hearts for him. The eternal flame will burn in my heart with his spirit till we unite in Heaven. God bless you my little grandson.

Smiley, your Poppy

Your support can have a real impact and assists us to provide help to families like Lane's.

Darryl’s story above highlights two pressing needs. It is vital that SIDS and Kids can offer crisis and bereavement support services to people whose child dies suddenly and unexpectedly no matter where they live in Victoria. The growth of regional services is imperative. And, secondly, it’s vital to offer support services for every member of the family – male or female, young or old – throughout the period of crisis and bereavement.

You can help SIDS and Kids Victoria in its work by becoming a SIDS and Kids Victoria donor. All donations over $2 are tax deductible and will be used to support bereaved families, fund new research to find the causes of unexplained child death, and provide education to reduce the risk of SIDS.

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